Melancholy Monday!


Feeling a bit melancholy today! I know I mentioned it earlier, and actually had a better handle on it earlier. As the day passed and weakness set in, had to give into a few tears. You would be proud though, maybe ten minutes, and then I set my mind to looking at the bright side. Man, when that evil twin sets in at you, he is hard to drown out with that sweet angelic on (must be the quiet voice)! But, with any determination, that lucky angel will win! The hardest part is not letting nostalgia set in, it is one thing to reminisce over happy times and remember the good old days. Take the time to remember a lost friend or lover, but letting it take over, and thinking the good old days, are the only good days, well that is not healthy. For me, the hardest part is saying goodbye.  Goodbye to those faces, places and times. Goodbye to those feelings and familiarities. That is the hard part. Losing those warm fuzzy feelings with such fondness.

Then, the light bulb went on. Saying goodbye means saying hello, to a whole host of things. Many of which ( I am betting) will be even better than the things left behind! I keep envisioning myself lighter, some clothes in a knapsack, and my art supplies and artwork. Heading out into a sunset of unknowns. No furniture, no baggage, just me a the few necessities. It feels so good. Not sure, how much I will liquidate in the end, could be I am just over simplifying things. No worries though, still got a minute or two to get all my ducks in a row. So, while I twiddle away the hours tonight not sleeping ( apparently, this has me going, insomnia is on the menu tonight), I will be working out a plan. Not sure how much of a plan, but the beginnings are for tonight! Wish me luck, lots to sort out.

Little early for the lottery, so no news there, just yet! Hopefully tonight will be my night. I am definitely ready for some big changes. Been thinking about, finding a charity to work with, and cooking too! Lucky for me, there is a lot of talents to choose from. Just sad it is not my art just yet, been waiting my whole life for this moment. Yet, once again, the rug gets ripped out, and now I am not sure, if I will have to wait again. Hopefully it will not be for long, it really is the only sanity I have. Wishing you a blessed night night, full of happy dreams. Hoping your tomorrow is even better than today, thank you for taking the time to read this blog. Hopefully sleep will come to you, in a more timely fashion than it did for me! All my love to you, diana

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